Ugh, hard to get over trauma when people keep blaming me

It has been really hard dealing with the trauma of my interaction with what I'm now seeing as the prison-psychiatric system.

The reason is that people keep saying that because I hit the doctor (people like to call it "assaulted"),

There are many details that they are not considering:

-Why would I be calm for an hour at the ER, and then suddenly start screaming when the doctor came in and said "You don't have scabies, you're just anxious." Maybe it had something to do with what she said? Ya think?
-Drugs were not necessary. When I was held down for about a minute, I calmed down completely and they let me go and I was just sitting there talking with them calmly. They didn't need to do anything else.
-How about waiting at least 15 minutes to see if someone can calm down with non-drug means?

There is something wrong with a system that jumps to drugging people immediately without trying any other options.

Hell, there is something wrong with involuntarily jumping to a really extreme solution without trying less aggressive options.

There should be a range of options for possible escalation:
-Talk with the patient about how they are feeling.
-Turn off the lights and help them to calm down.
-Get a therapist to ask them what's wrong.

I guess the issue is that many people don't want to question the medical and psychiatric system. There's this groupthink that says, "This is what we have to do for the safety of hospital workers."

So we traumatize patients and act against their safety. It's a case where they are a minority and their rights don't matter, because the educated and largely white, neurotypical doctors' rights matter.

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